Whitney Houston Factoids
These are the Lesser Known Facts About Whitney as compiled by The Sam Proclivity.
I am Whitney Houston. You are Whitney Houston. Whitney Houston is our psyche’s way of expressing our disatisfaction with life.
Whitney Houston’s jaw dislocates in 7 places when she goes for a high note.
Whitney Houston holds the record for the longest sustained annoyance in popular music.
Whitney Houston was the inspiration for the famous game Rock Star Ate My Hamster because she did actually eat a hamster once, with fries.
Whitney means ‘From the white island’.
Whitney Houston has the power of God. Her octave range has the same force as Moses was given. She even killed the first born on a sunny Tuesday in Burbank reheasing for The Arseneo Hall Show.
Whitney began doing drugs after realizing that with great power comes great responsibility. She couldn’t handle the strain.
The entire Star Wars saga is based on her life, including her turn into Darth Whitney.
It was not Bobby Brown who introduced her to drugs, as orginally thought. It was actually Tito Jackson when she asked for a Tic Tac and was slipped a Ruffie instead.
Before Bobby, she had a long relationship with The Count fron Sesame Street. It ended in sadness when Whitney found The Count in a three way with two of the Pussycats.
Whitney Houston was not born as humans are. She is actually a sonic construct that arose when high note from Patti LaBelle crossed with Dusty Spingfield during a summer concert.
Whitney Houston’s name IS Whitney Houston.
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